You might think Johan Santana is immortal.  But, like the rest of us, he's day-to-day.

That's okay, Johan.  Don't rush back.  Thursday's win aside, the season's done.  Bobby Ojeda thinks you're headed for a monster season in 2011 (that's right ... that's what he said) now that you have the pitch tipping thing eradicated.  You'll need to have a monster season if the Mets can't clear any payroll before April and you have to carry this same bunch on your back.  So forget about 2010, and keep that pectoral muscle from being shredded like Camden Yards pork.  Oh, and let's just hope that that muscle wasn't strained taking a swing at somebody in the family room.

(With the amount of time it took to get that news to the masses, I thought we had another Frankie situation on our hands ... either that or Johan decided to join the peace corps after the fifth inning.)

Besides, with Lucas Duda batting second, your team will be juuuuuuuuust fiiiiiiiiiiine.

Well since the Mets are playing like dead dogs, it stands to reason that the team below them in the standings should be even deader. Right?

Oh, I see. I team more out of it than the Mets showing some ... er, fight?

Longtime readers of this space can probably guess that I'm for hard nosed baseball, and I'm also for vigilante justice.  I don't think it makes me a bad person but that's between me and a higher being, isn't it ...

So I sighed longingly when Nyjer Morgan went after Chris Volstad.  Aah, emotion.  Where is that in Flushing?  When does anybody fight here?  Hell, Morgan ran over more catchers in a week than the Mets have in six years.  Take time out of your day for a few seconds to think about that.

Now running over a catcher who doesn't have the ball and wasn't near the plate is incredibly stupid.  Morgan would have been thrown at if he was allowed to play the next day.  So I cannot sanction that.  The second catcher obliteration?  Borderline at best.  Hard nosed baseball.  So the Marlins felt they had to bean him and protect their teammate, which I'm all for.  Morgan takes his first beaning and moves on. 

Then he steals second and third base, which the Marlins had a problem with.  Apparently, baseball etiquette says you don't do that down by 11 runs.  I love when teams justify being mad about something because it's an "unwritten rule", which for all I know says that you made it up in your head.  Up by 11 I can see.  But down by 11 runs in the fourth inning is something else entirely.  Morgan's steals led directly to a run, and the Nationals had closed that gap to five runs with plenty of time left in the game.  So why is what Morgan did a crime?

Oh, because the Marlins ... arbitrators of justice since 2007 ... say so.  I get it now.  Whether you side with the Marlins being the judges of justice or not (I'm kinda tired of them in general but I'm admittedly biased), they'll always rule the day here because nobody on the Mets has the kind of marbles to do something about it like Morgan did.  So it should come as no surprise to you when I say that I would welcome Morgan, former hockey player, here to pour some vinegar into the corn flakes of the N.L. East ... whether he's justified or not.  I'm not picky given the comatose state of the Mets right now.  Hell, I root for Sean Avery so of course I'd welcome Morgan with open arms.  This surprises you?

Except that if they give him a physical (not a given in Flushing), the doctors will probably neuter Morgan per club policy.

The lines have been drawn.  Who do you side with?

To be honest, Snoop deserved what happened Wednesday night.

Manuel on Carter, Duda, Beltran defensive outfield: "Whoooo, Lord have mercy...I've got to tell Pelfrey, Keep that (ball) down."

That's good.  Throw the outfield under the bus with a funny joke before they even play that night.  Yeah, Beltran might have lost nine steps but the steps he has left he's busting his butt with just to be out there, probably filled with some self-doubt as to whether he'll ever be the same player he was again ... this after the Mets most likely turned him into a shell of his former self by telling him that all he needed was seventeen cortisone shots.  So let's make him the subject of a joke.  And speaking of busting his butt, Chris Carter does so every day for seven damn hours before every stupid meaningless game to try to make Snoop look like a genius for putting him in the lineup (even though he was sent down at the beginning of the season to make sure that Mike Jacobs strikes out a billion times), and he rags on him.  And Lucas Duda can't play defense before he even plays a game in the majors?

Ironically, Duda made a couple of halfway decent plays in the outfield on Wednesday running down a fly ball and a base hit.  Of course, after he does that and undoubtedly put a smile on Snoop's face ... a smile he doesn't deserve ... Duda cramped up and left the game.  Truthfully, served Snoop right.  You ragged on your own team, they prove you wrong, then you lose them.  It would have made a great Twilight Zone episode, right up there with Burgess Meredith stepping on his glasses after the nuclear war.  The end of the episode sees Snoop getting punished by managing the rest of his days in the Can Am league for the Quebec team where what little salary he makes is hammered by taxes.  Oliver Perez is on the mound, Brian Schneider is his cleanup hitter, and Joaquin Arias is his left fielder for all of eternity.  Every game.

And Gary Carter and Wally Backman are on his coaching staff, sharpening hatchets at every turn.  Yeah.  That would be a great Twilight Zone episode.

I see we've reached "that" part of the season.

"Manuel wanted to give newly acquired Joaquin Arias a start -- perhaps in the outfield -- but didn't think the ex-Ranger would be ready because he has been idle for two weeks." -Adam Rubin

I suppose that now that Joaquin Arias is the property of the New York Mets, that it would be a fine time to bring up that Arias has never played the outfield in his professional life.  I have to hand it to Snoop, when I think Omar Minaya has whittled the value of the roster down to nothing, Manuel goes above and beyond to find a value that's lower than absolute zero.  To hell with the laws of thermodynamics.

But he'll find it.  He'll find it because he's relentless, and because he'll have plenty of time.

"Manuel was asked if his own tenuous status is difficult or unsettling.  "No, I'm going to be here for the next 10 years," he said with a laugh."

Tip your waitress, try the veal.  And please welcome to the stage and give a big hand to your new eighth inning guy: Rob Dibble.

There once was a guy who started with a red paper clip.  And through a series of trades, acquired a farmhouse in Canada.

The Mets have a general manager who started with a crown jewel prospect.  And through a series of trades over five years, acquired Joaquin Arias.

The paper clip has more value.

You can say a lot about the tenure of Omar Minaya's tenure.  This lineage of trades might be signature Omar.  Crown jewel prospects are either can't miss, or wheeled as part of a package for a player with immense value (Justin Smoak for Cliff Lee, for example.)  Lastings Milledge had been talked about as a guy who could bring back Barry Zito or Manny Ramirez in a trade.  Instead, the deal fell apart because of money(of course).  Milledge was exposed to the major leagues, then traded for Ryan Church and Brian Schneider.  Schneider was about as useful as creamed spinach at a Texas barbecue and was released.  Church, who was devalued further by Snoop Manuel's fascination with getting Gary Sheffield at-bats, and even further by Mets doctors who thought "yeah, he can get on the plane fine", was traded for Jeff Francoeur last season.  Frenchy, after another brutal loss to the Atlanta Braves, was traded to Texas for Arias ... who was recently demoted to make room for Alex Cora.  That's how good Joaquin Arias is.

Alex Cora.

The only redeeming feature about Arias is that he's probably better than Luis Castillo, who has apparently joined a religious cult where bending is considered a sin.

For this, and this alone, Omar Minaya should be fired ... and banned from Citi Field.

Hindsight?  Maybe.  But this has been a Met blueprint: Rush up the prospects so that they can be exposed as "not-ready", then traded at ten cents on the dollar. 

And please don't, under any circumstances, bring up the irrelevant fact that Lastings Milledge is no great shakes as a ballplayer.  While true, it's not the point.  Good GM's recognize the value of a prospect and protect it until his career takes off or until it's time to trade him for a major piece to augment the major league club.  Bad GM's wait until the entire world sees the flaws of the crown jewel, and trades him for a light hitting catcher and a halfway-decent outfielder.  If the Mets knew that this guy was a pretender and waited until everyone else saw it too to trade him, that's inexcusable.  Almost as inexcusable as trading Scott Kazmir for their own percieved value rather than the value he actually had in the marketplace.

The massive flaws of an organization exposed for the world to see ... again.

Now Jeff Francoeur, whose Met career will be marked by a wide smile and a game-ending triple play, is a Texas Ranger.  He'll probably hit a playoff winning home run off Mariano Rivera to become a cult hero, and then be released halfway through 2011 to open up a chain of Texas barbecue joints named "Mr. 100" in honor of his home run total ... or career OPS.  Meanwhile Arias will probably pull his hamstring out of his leg through his kneecap in a freak eating accident, never to be heard from again.

Can we hire the paper clip guy to replace Omar?

I love when Bobby Ojeda opens the silo doors.

He's good for that about once a season.  But hell, somebody needs to.  It sure as hell isn't going to be Jeff Wilpon, who was down in Atlanta for the second time this season to answer questions with more questions with 18,000 of his closest enemies in Atlanta (Seriously?  18,000 people?  Far be it from me to question the ways that people in Atlanta spend their disposable income but hell the Mets drew more than that in those days they really stunk, er ... last week.)

But Ojeda was classic after a 9-3 loss to Atlanta to pretty much end the hopes of those last holdouts in fantasy land ... blasting everything from Oliver Perez to Ike Davis' lazy toss to second to Angel Pagan barking at the umpire after a called strike three ("Gee, can't be my fault ... getting tired of seeing that" ... LOVE IT!)  Don't forget that Ojeda was fired from the Cyclones by the same regime because he had the audacity to speak his mind, and now he gets paid to do it to an audience in the hundreds of thousands yet dwindling by the day.  Irony is a beautiful thing.  And Ojeda's rant was melodic.  Somebody has gotta speak their mind.  It was a rant the type that will get that roster to sit up, take notice, and most likely complain that Ojeda doesn't know what he's talking about. 

That's how you know he's right ... when the team starts whining about it.  And I hope they do.  I hope they hear every word of it and bitch and moan until Mary Poppins comes home.  Let's separate the whiners from the men who actually want to play this game and be accountable for their mistakes.  And when spring training comes next season, let's get whoever wants to whine and bitch about Bob Ojeda, Darryl Strawberry, Keith Hernandez, or any announcer that dares to dole out some "harsh truth", and present them with a one way ticket to the New Jersey Jackals to play for $25,000 a season.  And that includes the manager who's responsible for a good portion of this mess and came up with this gem after the game:

 "We haven't for the most part been very good offensively all year."

Well there's an excuse to run the "Breaking News" graphic!  What's next, Snoop?  Israel and Palestine haven't for the most part been getting along in the last hundred years?  The Beatles for the most part played musical instruments?  David Eckstein for the most part is on the not-so-tall side?  Please, Jerry!  Don't hold back your keen insight!

I want everyone to remember this game come next spring and Oliver Perez is working on a new pitch in Port St. Lucie, Jose Reyes is two-three weeks away from taking live batting practice, Jeff Francoeur is smiling ear to ear for reporters because he's learned a new approach at the plate while fishing with Howard Johnson at Lake Batting Eye, Ruben Tejada is locked in a death battle with Luis Hernandez for the 25th roster spot while Luis Castillo works on a new "Get the ball out of the damn infield" drill after losing 30 pounds, winning the second base job, and replacing his knee with a recycled garbage can ... and Carlos Beltran petitions the league for the use of a golf cart in center field. And you leave me angry comments asking why the hell I'm so damn negative all the time and that I should buck up and be a man.

That's when I point to this lifeless game and all the ones before it authored by 25 men for whom October can't get here quick enough, a manager who is best suited to be the team dietitian because he's really really nice but can't come up with a strategy better than the Disjointed U, and a front office and ownership that thought that it was all injuries last season and that they just needed a little pick up from Jason Bay and some healthy bodies ... but Bay is off currently phoning his Canadian buddy Eric Lindros for post concussion syndrome advice while Lindros keeps answering his banana.

That's why.

So keep the doors open Bobby O.  Make sure your aim is true.  And wake me up for R.A. Dickey's next start.

After weeks of the Mets announcers reminding us what Atlanta and Philadelphia had done, taunting us with the hopefulness of a pennant race that didn't really exist, the theme of Sunday was talking about 2011, and what the Mets could do to make it not resemble of seven month long Bataan Death March.  It was probably the biggest concession yet that this season is pretty much over.

It was sad in its own way.  If there's one thing Met fans can take pride in (and it might be just one thing), its that the announcers play it down the middle in their analysis and tell it like it is.  And during Sunday's win, there was a lot of telling ... like it is.

Still, even though fans have basically passed the Mets season off as dead after the west coast trip, and even though the announce team has finally somewhat joined the movement on Sunday, it almost feels like a mathematical elimination.  And mathematical elimination is a down day whether your team is 1 game out or a million.  The acknowledgement by the home broadcasters before that day are like hearing that there's no transplant that can help the patient.  (Not that Omar Minaya looked, but whatever.)  The only thing left is to take the season off life support, and that comes with mathematical elimination.  So even though we were treated to the realism that we all appreciate, it still was accompanied by sadness.

We'll get over it.

As for the specifics what the announcers actually said about 2011, it was all a blur.  Well, except for the part about Oliver Perez which was basically "Hey, he thinks he's been treated unfairly?  Well how about pitching worth a damn???" or something like that.  I was too distracted by the majesty that is R.A. Dickey and his big bat ... wait, that didn't come out right.  How about: R.A. Dickey is the best hitter on the team?  Better, sure.  Or how about: How putrid would this season have been without R.A. Dickey?

But it was said, and that's the main thing.  The season, although not officially over, is now officially going gentle into that good night of October.

Of course, until the end of the game when Keith couldn't resist a "the Mets need to sweep the Braves ... "  Seasons, like old habits, die hard.

Frankie Rodriguez is a little upset right now.  Obviously, Saturday was Criminal Day at the ballpark and nobody told him.

But he's also relieved that another Met acquisition from days gone by is making Frankie look like he's a member of the Peace Corps, as noted criminal Ambiorix "Feloniorix" Burgos was discovered to have kidnapped his ex-wife while forcing her to eat rat poison.  Meanwhile, Brian Bannister is on the disabled list after having a 1-8 record in his previous nine starts.   However, 1-8 is a much better record than, oh ... criminal.  Nice trade Omar.  Please keep Feloniorix away from the Skinny N' Sweet.

(Editor's note: According to imdb.com, the 1980 flick "9 to 5" is up 15% in popularity this week.  Well with that rat poison storyline, one can only wonder why.)

There has to be some sort of symmetry that on the day most of us found this out, another noted alleged criminal (the case was dismissed) Brett Myers shut down the Mets and sent them further on the road toward mediocrity and irrelevancy, seemingly to spend all eternity ... or at least until 2012 when they get rid of $10 trillion* in payroll.  It's one thing to lose, it's quite another to lose to Brett Myers whether he goes 100 straight games of six innings or more, or he gets bombed for the rest of his life.  It's Brett Myers.  Yup, the magical season continues.

Boy if Saturday doesn't put you in the mood for an MSNBC Lockup marathon, I don't know what will.  I for one am in the mood for Violet Newstead to serve me some coffee.

*Numbers obtained independently (In other words, I made it up.)

And Matt Harvey's fun ride begins.  Just don't ride in a Miami taxi at 2AM.

I understand that the Citi Field sit out was on Wednesday night. I didn't realize that it had become Woodstock and extended to Thursday. Take a look:

There's people everywhere protesting and rolling around in the mud drinking beer in a non-stop Citi Field sit out. They must have been out there ... because they sure as hell weren't here. I know it's only been a season and a half but I've never seen this place so empty. Then again, that it's only taken a season and a half at a new ballpark for it to look like this is the point exactly, isn't it? Just look at that whole empty section right in front of the picture! They must have been sitting out and having more fun than I did watching this game and watching Jose Reyes leave the game ... same picture, but zoomed in and enhanced with dialogue bubbles:

A mild oblique strain. They say no baseball activities until he's pain free.  Question now becomes: is batting right handed a baseball related activity?

"As of right now, we see this as a day-to-day thing." -Snoop Manuel

This can only mean one thing: We'll never see Jose Reyes again.

But when you zoom into another part of that same picture, you can see that there were other protests happening that were actually inCiti Field:

The protest on the right is fairly obvious, and a little hilarious.  The protest on the left? Not so obvious.  But completely hilarious.

Free Oliver Perez?

I would have taken an appearance by Ollie over Jeff Francoeur's at-bat music.  Consider that the Mets lost 11-4. Jose Reyes is out with injury, again.  Snoop didn't pull Jon Niese in time and even if he did, Elmer Dessens was atrocious.  Ruben Tejada is going to go 0-for-his next 12,000.  The Mets led off seven of the nine regulation innings with walks, and still only scored four runs (seriously, how does that happen?)  I could swear I saw Alex Cora during the "don't swear, throw stuff, or hit a Citi Field usher in the eye with a commemorative shot glass" montage in the first inning.  And I still think the worst part of Thursday's ballpark experience was Frenchy's walk-up music.  It wasn't his usual mix of country and rock ... I don't even know what it was, and it may or may not have been a good song.  But a slow, sappy ballad as a walk-up tune?  I sincerely hope he lost a bet.  Look, that might have been an award winning song but from my point of view, as Joe Fan, walk-up music is supposed to make me want to scream my head off and murder somebody.  It's not supposed to remind me that I need to accessorize my apartment with items from Pottery Barn.  But I guess it fits the mood at the park these days.

The worst part is that Frenchy had two hits and a walk so even if he did lose a bet, we're going to have to hear this for the rest of the season.  No Jose Reyes, and walk-up ballads?  So much for the last 40 games not sucking.  Thanks Frenchy.